A photo meme cropped up on my feed today. It read “When a woman says ‘when you get a chance’, what she really means is ‘get off your ass and do it NOW'”
What does this say to me? First, it says ‘women are poor communicators’. It literally says that women do not mean what they say. That they cannot competently ask for what they want.
It says that women are manipulative. That they want to get what they want without having to express it clearly.
It says that women are controlling. They want to get what they want, and they don’t want their partner to have a choice in it.
It says that women expect their men to read their mind. They want them to interpret a basic request in a way that is unconnected to they way they were asked.
It says that women do not respect their partners. Respect is not based on poor communication, manipulation and control.
And it implies we’re all the same.
If you want to tell a man to ‘get off your ass and do it NOW’, then the adult thing to do is say that (possibly with more politeness). If you say ‘when you have a minute’, let it mean what is said. Ask for what you want, and accept the consequences if you get what you asked for instead of what you wanted. It’s not a hard concept.